We either stay miserable,
We end the relationship, or
We change our selves.
The strain of a relationship is never the fault of only one person.
"If, on our first date, you chase me around the parking lot with a baseball bat, yea, that's all on you. If, however, we go on a second date, now I am sharing in the dysfunction."
"Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me."
Couples in Conflict (CiC) is not the typical approach to couple / marriage counseling. Couples in Conflict is a specific approach focusing on partnering through conflict. While each partner works with me individually on their own issues, couple sessions focus on the difficulty/ resistance experienced in utilizing Agreements as a mediator.
To participate in Couples in Conflict both partners agree to participate in one month of weekly individual sessions AND CiC sessions. This first month of CiC introduces the dynamic of Agreements while individual sessions focus on discerning individual leanings and predilections.
Within the first month we will establish what works and what doesn't.
In lieu of divorce, CiC can effectively be combined with a therapeutic separation.
Obviously, CiC only works with partners that wish to remain partners.